WELCOME to AMERICA!
美国欢迎你!
By Patrick Broderick ■伊川
译注
The United States has been called a "melting
pot" because it boils away the character of immigrants from many
diverse backgrounds and nationalities. America's ancestors were foreigners,
just like you! While some of these immigrants "migrated" here
against their will, these days all of America's slave labor is "practiced"
overseas.
FOOD
Italy has pasta, Mexico the enchirito,1
but don't count America out! American ingenuity has provided the world
with many unique foodstuffs: pudding in a can, spiced meat wands, fruit-colored
corn syrup patties, etc.
Restaurants that combine food and entertainment
are an American specialty. You've probably heard of such famous American
establishments as Planet Hollywood and the Hard Rock Cafe where you
can enjoy a variety of fried foods underneath Jean-Claude Van Damme's2
underpants or Neal Schon's3 guitar. Many large
cities have "fifties"—themed diners, where you can be transported
back in time to a more innocent era where hamburgers cost nine dollars.
MUSIC
American popular music can be heard booming from
trendy clothing boutiques, inside family restaurants, from car windows,
and through the paper-thin walls of your hotel room. A "Walkman"
personal stereo is a wise investment, as it allows you to listen only
to your choice of music, and drowns out disagreeable loud noises common
in American cities (honking car horns, screams for help, the Dave Matthews
Band4).
MOVIES
The moviegoing experience is quite different here
than in your country. Americans like their movies LOUD. In fact, in
most multiplexes,5 it's possible to hear the
noisier parts of the movie being shown in the adjacent theatre. Don't
worry, though, the sound is generally not so loud that it will prevent
you from hearing your cell phone ringing or your fellow patrons talking
all the way through the film.
SPORTS
Sports are a favorite pastime in the United States.
Watching them, that is, not playing them. Americans attend the games
dressed in the colors of their local sports teams, who are usually named
for a unique local animal or feature. For instance, basketball's Utah
Jazz pay tribute to the state's rich musical heritage.
CRIME AND SAFETY
Some visitors to the United States think America
is a dangerous country filled with pistol-wielding thugs. Of course
they're wrong — some Americans prefer knives, or even vials of acid.
Follow these tips to avoid becoming a victim of America's mostly criminal
populace or her draconian laws.
1. Narcotics are illegal in the United States, and the penalties for
attempting to obtain them are steep. Be sure to bring plenty from home.
2. Do your best to look like a local. Thieves prey on tourists, and
foreign visitors are easy marks with their brightly-colored clothing,
comically oversized backpacks, cameras strung around their necks, maps
sticking out of every pocket—I mean, Jesus Christ, have you looked at
yourselves?
3. Stay with your own kind. Most major American cities have a "touristy"
area where locals never go. Whether it's San Francisco's Fisherman's
Wharf, Fells Point in Baltimore or South Street Seaport in New York
City, you can be sure the people milling about are tourists —just like
you! Stay there and you'll have hours of safe, expensive fun in an area
nothing like the deadly city you came to visit.
1.enchirito:一种墨西哥煎饼,主要原料为玉米饼、牛肉、辣椒、洋葱等。
2.Jean-Claude Van Damme:通常译为尚格云顿,美国打斗片明星。
3.Neal Schon:尼尔·舍恩,美国吉他手,“旅行”(Journey)摇滚乐队主要成员。
4.Dave Matthews Band:美国著名流行乐团,组建于1990年。
5.multiplex:有多个独立房间的复合式建筑,此处指有多个放映厅的影院。